Day…. ? on Alesse

AlesseIf you read earlier, you know that I officially went on birth control for the first time about half a month ago.  I know, I’m super good with the calculations, but I don’t have the little pack with me, so I can’t count.  I’m close to half way done.

So what is the update?  Nothing.  Seriously, nothing.  I’ve had no side effects at all!  No spotting.  No bloating.  I feel totally normal.  Sometimes I wonder if it’s working at all.  I was all prepared for the worst, but really, I haven’t had anything stand out as being caused by birth control.

I’m going to give it a huge thumbs up.  We’ll see how my period goes.  If it’s light, then I’m going to kick myself for not doing this sooner.

There is perhaps one thing, now that I think about it, that I didn’t think to attribute to birth control.  That is my level of sexual desire.  Lets just call it the level of how horny I am.  In the last week, it’s been seriously crazy.

Now I’m no prude.  I love a good roll around.  I have a pretty active imagination and I’m comfortable talking about it.  But this is extreme, even for me.  I catch myself considering the people around me I’ve never considered before, and shouldn’t consider.  I have to shake myself, and then go take care of myself.  I’m not usually so…randy!  I’m thinking it’s time to start dating again.  I wanted to wait at least a month to make sure these little pills are working, but I’m not sure I can.  Even now, sitting at my desk, writing this, I’m wondering if I should go onto POF and choose one of the guys who’s been talking to me, and just call him over.  Usually I would talk myself into a few dates first.  This could be dangerous.


Day one of Alesse

AlesseSo today I got my period.  Hurray, right? Yeah, no, not excited.  But it does mean that I’m officially on birth control now.  Took my very first pill this morning, and so far, I have almost nothing to report.  Seriously, nothing.  I didn’t get any kind of side affect at all.  So I suppose that’s good.  I’m not sure I’ll be saying the same thing in a few weeks, but we’ll see 🙂


AlesseHere is a confession.  Ladies, don’t judge me.  I’ve never been on birth control.  :O  I know, right!!!!

Here’s the thing.  Growing up, I was too embarrassed to ask my parents for it.  I had wonderful parents, but they did tend to frown on anything to do with boys.  Especially my dad.  When I got to college, I didn’t have a family doctor and I was simply too busy to be bothered.  Then I started dating, and became incredibly devoted to condoms.  And…well time just went by.  All of a sudden I’m 27 and I’ve never been on birth control.  Crazy!!  How did I manage not to get pregnant all these years??  I must be one of the luckiest women on the planet!

But I’m turning a new leaf.  With my new single status and eventually dating, it simply has to happen.  I went to my doctor this morning and she gave me Alesse.

It’s funny, because I remember watching the commercials for Alesse when I was young.  She talked about the possible side affects, and gave me other options like an IUD.  But she said that this is a good start for me, and so I’m taking her word for it.

Side affects.  Good lord.  As if we didn’t have it hard enough as women.  Spotting, bloating, possible nausea.  *sigh.  Okay, here we go.  All that stuff isn’t so abnormal when your a woman anyway.

I’m one of those people who can count, to the day, when my period is coming.  Like seriously, mark it on your calendar it’s coming.  I am as regular as they come.  So how is this going to affect that?  I’ve come to count on my regular schedule.  I can predict it, and prepare for it.  Now with possible spotting and bloating, I’m going to have to be prepared all the time!  I guess there are worse things in the world.  I could get pregnant!!

This is going to be simply a conversation about how this affects me.  I want to give some tips to those, probably younger than me, going on birth control for the first time.  Those are the side affects my doctor told me about.  I’ll be honest with the crazy and maybe icky things that happen to me going on the pill, and if the pill doesn’t work, then we’re going on to an IUD.  But one step at a time.


promiscuousSomething has happened since I’ve been single.  It’s been two weeks now, officially. Two weeks yesterday.  In this two weeks, a few things have changed drastically to my, physically.  I have more energy, I’m waaaaay happier, I’m excited about working out, I move more, and… I’m extremely aroused more often then I’m used too.

It made me think about the last year of my relationship.  I was not sexually interested in my partner.  The attraction had long past, and I had given up trying.  I would do what I could to make myself as unattractive to him as possible, which in turn made me feel less attractive myself.  That totally suppressed my sex drive, and I found that I really wasn’t all that interested in sex.

That’s changed now.  It’s like that blanket covering my promiscuousness has left, and I’m back to being me, only now I feel like I’ve been starving myself.  All of a sudden I understand why rebound sex is a thing.  When a relationship ends and it was a long time coming, all of a sudden your free to do what you want, and sex becomes a big thing in the forefront of your mind once more.  I mean, seriously.  How often do you get turned on during your morning commute?  Apparently I do.  How about your gym time?  Yup, I do.  This must be what guys feel like all the time.

I’m not ready to jump into something right away.  I want to make sure that I am physically and emotionally comfortable with myself.  Maybe Fake Doctor Guy I met on Plenty of Fish will be a good choice when I’m ready 🙂 If half of what he says is true, then he’s a good choice.  But I digress.  The point is that I thought there was something wrong with me, that I didn’t want sex anymore.  Turns out it was just that the relationship was long over.  Attraction is an important thing.  I learned that I couldn’t be with someone that I wasn’t attracted to, no matter how much money they had, or how they showered me with gifts.  I couldn’t use something.  I need to feel that absolute need to have him or her right away.


online datingSo I’ve entered the wide world of Online Dating, sort of, if you read my last post you know why I say sort of.  Anyway, I wanted to talk a moment about sexting, as apparently it’s a staple in Online Dating.

This guy I met, as outline below, I’ve taken to calling ‘fake doctor guy’, because well…thought he was lying about going to medical school when we first started talking.  Turns out he wasn’t.  Score!  But Fake Doctor guy has been pretty good about not letting conversations get overly sexual, unless first I tease him, then he’s all for it.  It’s a nice change, because everyone else starts off with it.  Seriously guys?  How about ask at least one questions about me before you get into the sex talk.  (I’m rolling my eyes right now.)  But Fake Doctor Guy waited until I opened up the option.

Now I’m no prude.  I do like to talk about sex, and I do like to try new things.  I have a small list of things I simply will not do, and if I haven’t tried it, I’ll probably try it once before I say no.  Now that you have the context of what I’m like, I found sexting kind of strange.

The thing about is that it kind of turns you on, but then you have to type while you’re doing it, so it can’t really go into anything more…physical.  Maybe that’s the point?  I’m not really sure.  Fake Doctor Guy seems to like all the same things I do, or so he says (and we always believe guys on the internet), but what is really the appeal of sexting.  There is an ultimate hindrance to it.

Am I doing it wrong?  Is there some specific skill that I’m missing to be able to sext correctly?  And how do you stop it going on and on?  If you begin, how to you steer the conversation away from it again if you don’t want to anymore?

Victoria Secret

victorias secretI’ve mentioned before that after my breakup, I moved in with Dee, who is twice my age but that doesn’t affect our friendship in the slightest.

Dee separated from her husband a few years ago.  Let’s just say he was a lying, cheating… (insert as many foul words as you can think of.)  Since he’s been gone, she’s really started her life anew, and she’s doing so well!  I’m happy to say that today she is a wonderful, happy, adventurous person that is eager to experience all the world as to offer.

One thing she’s not comfortable with, is sex.  I’ve talked about the difference our generations of taught us about sex, and I always find it so strange the way people once thought.  We discovered she’s simply not very comfortable with herself physically.

Now that’s crazy, because in the last six months, she’s been doing some crazy exercise and looks ah ma zing!  Like seriously.  She does not have the body of a 51 year old who’s had two children.

Just for fun, I took her to Victoria Secret.  Whether or not you’re into fancy undies, it’s still a sleek sexy place to go to look at silky and lacy finery.  Not to mention the whole store smells great.  To my delight, she was willing to try on a few bras.  After going through all the different options, she picked out a few that she liked, and we took into the back to try them on.

I was again surprised when she came out smiling, saying she really liked one.  We went back and picked out some simple little undies to go with it.  Not the super fancy ones that went with the bra, but simple black ones that went nicely with the black and white bra.  She was grinning the whole time, excited she had something a little bit sexy.  It was boggling to me to think she’d gotten through her marriage without having something sexy to put on.  I loved putting sexy things on, even if it was just for me.

When we got home, I told her to go try them on together in her room and just look at herself in the mirror.  Because she’d daring, she did it without fight.  A few moments later, I hear a gasp of surprise, and she comes running down the stairs in her robe.  She said ‘look’ a second before she drops the robe in the kitchen for me to see her in the sexy awesome bra and black panties.

Now I already knew she looked amazing.  What was exciting was the way she smiled, feeling for the first time I think in her whole life that she was fricken hot!  Of course I told her she looked amazing, and we laughed because she hadn’t realized the blinds were open (thankfully no one was home next door:).  That moment of happiness when you realize that yes, you are in fact sexy, is worth spending the money at Victoria Secret to get some sexy things.  I hope the confidence that’s been boosted will help her be herself, be comfortable with herself, and realize that she’s one fine woman!