I feel like we hear a lot ‘never look back’. There’s all kinds of quotes about ‘that’s not the way you’re going’ and ‘the past can’t be changed’. I get that and I think it’s important to realize that you can’t change the past, but should we really ignore it completely? People who know how to relax are those who can sit and enjoy the moments happening right now. So we can be mindful of the present, and look to the future, the past is to be forgotten? I agree that dwelling on the past is sort of useless, but I believe that we have to look at the past when the stress of today becomes overwhelming. Especially if we’ve been trying to achieve goals!
A few things have happened over the last month that have made me realize that I have no idea how far I’ve come. These things that came up were all from my past that I’d forgotten, ignored or just pushed away. First, I was going through Facebook and found a few pictures of myself from two years ago. I can honestly say that I was totally delusional about how big I was. I mean wow, I don’t remember getting that bad!! The black coat I was wearing was stretched at the buttons, almost bursting. My face was very plump and I was fully uncomfortable. I even felt uncomfortable looking at them. I couldn’t believe it. I quickly looked in the mirror and realized, damn, I’ve come a long way!!
Yesterday was a little chilly, so I pulled a coat out of my closet. I bought it at a consignment store last year in the fall, traveling with my family. I loved it, but it was too small and wouldn’t button. I bought it anyway because it looked good if I left it open. I haven’t worn it in months, maybe a year, and hadn’t really thought about wearing it. I pulled it out, put it on, and easily did up all the buttons. I stood there for a solid few minutes looking at myself in the mirror. The buttons weren’t even straining. This coat now fits me perfectly!! Continue reading