You must have breakfast!

breakfastI hate breakfast 😦  I mean seriously, it’s my least favorite thing in the day.  When I get up in the morning, I’m usually not all to ‘sunshine and rainbows’.  I’m not Oscar the Grouch either, but somewhere between.  I usually get right into the bathroom and wash my face or shower, to ensure that I’m awake and not going back to bed.  If I don’t, I go and sit on the couch, maybe watch some TV, and before I know it, it’s almost lunch.

Breakfast to me is that thing that you know you’re supposed to do, but its sort of like trying to swallow a spoonful of cinnamon.  Even if I’m hungry, I just don’t care.  If there was a healthy way to skip it, I would be there in a heartbeat.

Unlucky for me, it is generally excepted that breakfast is one of the most important things you do in a day.  And I believe that.  The days I skip breakfast, or have a muffin or something equally unhealthy, I feel it the rest of the day.  When my day starts bad, it’s next to impossible to keep on track.  A lunch of a sandwich and fruit turns into two slices of pizza with dipping sauce.  I’m tired and grumpy most of the day, which leads to binge eating when I get home.  Seriously, the affects are so obvious to me.  And yet I still hate it!  Choking down a piece of toast with Peanut butter is like licking the flagstone walk outside my work.  And forget cooking something.  I do not have the brain power to cook in the morning, nor to I particularly enjoy warm food first thing.  Is it impossible?!?!

Over the years I’ve developed a few tricks that keep my on track.  If you’re a breakfast hater like me, then give them a try, and let me know if you have some of your own.

1.) Eat at work:  I set my schedule to get up half an hour earlier, and arrive at work half an hour early.  I bring whatever I’m having for  breakfast with me, or have it pre-bought and waiting for me at work.  I’m lucky to have a fridge, toaster, kettle, etc. in the work kitchen.  I get there, make some tea, put my breakfast on a plate, and sit down and eat before getting to the grind.  When you get to work early, you don’t really want to start working, so it forces you to sit down and do something else.  Usually the morning of getting ready plus the drive means I’m finally ready to eat by the time I get to work.  If you can’t wait this long, then you don’t have the same hatred of breakfast I do.

2.) Keep it absurdly simple:  I mean ‘peel a banana and done’ kind of stupid simple.  I cut up a banana on my place, pair it with some fat free yogurt or a piece of whole wheat toast with PB and I’m done.  Sometimes I’ll cut up an apple with PB.  But I don’t cook, and I don’t bring anything that’s going to take a ton of prep.

3.) Eat Lunch Earlier:  If you haven’t had a big meal in the morning, you don’t want those hunger pains to get you mid morning.  If possible, have lunch earlier.  I’m not a snacker, but if you are, make sure you plan a snack mid morning if you can’t have lunch before lunch time.

4.) Make lunch the most nutritious part of your day:  If your breakfast is left wanting, then an equally lackluster lunch is going to leave you craving like crazy in the afternoon.  But if you have a sandwich packed with veggies, some Edemame and Sashimi, a salad with beats and carrots, then your afternoon is going to go way better.  But stay away from salt.  When I go for Sushi at lunch, the salt in the soy sauce always makes me crave sweets all afternoon.

5.) Never buy something on your way:  Back to breakfast.  If I think to myself ‘I’ll just buy something when I get there’, I know it’s going to go wrong.  That’s when I end up with a muffin and a coffee.  You have good intentions, but you don’t want to spend that much money on breakfast, so you grab that closest cheapest thing.  That thing is never good.  Pack it and bring it with you, or have something waiting for you at work.

6.) No smoothies:  I know a bunch of people that jump right to smoothies in the morning.  Here’s my problem.  I hate noise.  There is nothing worse than noise in the morning to make me grumpy.  My ex used to get up and watch videos on his computer.  Oh man, I could have killed him.  Once he was watching something with gunfire and shouting, and I was like ‘are you serious dude?’.  Morning needs to be calm and gentle, and give me time to wake up and get going.  A jet engine blender making my breakfast is like grabbing hold of the annoyance inside of me, and shaking it until it’s built to blind rage.  No smoothies.

7.) Microwave oatmeal:  Here’s a trick.  If you want oatmeal, but can’t be bothered to make it, go and get some of those microwavable ones and add fruit.  But don’t forget one important fact!!!  That junk has sugar.  Don’t fool yourself and think that the apple caramel cinnamon one has ‘oatmeal’ in it so it’s good for you.  It’s not.  Nothing about it is good for you.  It’s sugar.  Get the plain old steal cut oats.  The one with nothing in it at all, but oatmeal.  You can cut up apple and put in some cinnamon if that’s what you like.

That’s it, those are the things I do that make breakfast a actual part of my morning.  I struggle with brushing my teeth around breakfast, but I’ve found that brushing twice in the morning isn’t a bad thing.  I have a toothbrush at work that I use to do a quick after breakfast brush before getting to work.

Do you have your own tricks?  Can I know them?  To all fellow breakfast haters out there.  I can attest that forcing this meal on yourself in the morning is necessary.  Without it, you might as well accept the fact that your a grumpy carb addict and there’s nothing you can do about it.


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