Promiscuous

promiscuousSomething has happened since I’ve been single.  It’s been two weeks now, officially. Two weeks yesterday.  In this two weeks, a few things have changed drastically to my, physically.  I have more energy, I’m waaaaay happier, I’m excited about working out, I move more, and… I’m extremely aroused more often then I’m used too.

It made me think about the last year of my relationship.  I was not sexually interested in my partner.  The attraction had long past, and I had given up trying.  I would do what I could to make myself as unattractive to him as possible, which in turn made me feel less attractive myself.  That totally suppressed my sex drive, and I found that I really wasn’t all that interested in sex.

That’s changed now.  It’s like that blanket covering my promiscuousness has left, and I’m back to being me, only now I feel like I’ve been starving myself.  All of a sudden I understand why rebound sex is a thing.  When a relationship ends and it was a long time coming, all of a sudden your free to do what you want, and sex becomes a big thing in the forefront of your mind once more.  I mean, seriously.  How often do you get turned on during your morning commute?  Apparently I do.  How about your gym time?  Yup, I do.  This must be what guys feel like all the time.

I’m not ready to jump into something right away.  I want to make sure that I am physically and emotionally comfortable with myself.  Maybe Fake Doctor Guy I met on Plenty of Fish will be a good choice when I’m ready 🙂 If half of what he says is true, then he’s a good choice.  But I digress.  The point is that I thought there was something wrong with me, that I didn’t want sex anymore.  Turns out it was just that the relationship was long over.  Attraction is an important thing.  I learned that I couldn’t be with someone that I wasn’t attracted to, no matter how much money they had, or how they showered me with gifts.  I couldn’t use something.  I need to feel that absolute need to have him or her right away.

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